Recumbency

Whew!

2009-04-24T19:11:00.000-07:00

Holy Miracles.

It's pretty amazing - God's timing. I'm a pretty impatient person by nature. As Capt. Sig Hansen says, "I want a crab count and I want it NOW!!" I feel that way about most things - I want job security and I want it NOW...I want my students to not act like freaks, and I want them to not act like freaks NOW...I want to meet a guy who respects me and I want to meet him NOW...I want to win the lottery and I want it NOW...

But there is something to be said for patience...and God's timing. And in the past month, God has made Himself and His perfect timing oh so evident in the lives of my love ones, and thereby me....

First, Nathaniel Royce Sherbine...the baby no one thought would ever be. And yet, here he is. All 5 lbs. 15 ozs. of him, born on April 6th, joining his foster brothers, Dominic (4) and Aidan (3), and I imagine, the quietest little guy in the house.

I mean, don't you want to kiss those little lips? And don't you wonder what sort of ideas are spinning behind those beautiful eyes? It's amazing...God's timing...And here's the other one. I don't have a picture because if I try to load it, it'll throw off the whole shebang. But the story...ah, the story. My friend, Jenn, called me into her classroom to ask for my mom's contact information a little over a year ago. She wanted to bounce some ideas off of her about adoption. And after many prayers and lots of waiting... He's here - and he belongs to them for the moment...Whilden Lane Wood. All 6 lbs. 10 oz. of him (3 lbs. smaller than his big sister was) - adopted into a family that wanted him more than anything - and who was willing to wait for him. Things sort of just happened. There was a stir on Monday, action on Tuesday and Wednesday, concern on Thursday, and holy smokes, by Friday, the Wood Family of Three became the Wood Family of Four. And it took a while. But the timing was right. The timing was perfect. And I am reassured that His timing is perfect - I am reminded that He has the blueprints and knows what the final product will look like - and that as hard as it is, trusting Him means waiting for His grace and His blessing and His plan. All in His time....

A Word About Pap Smears

2009-03-04T13:44:00.000-08:00

I mean, seriously...

I have the utmost respect for doctors (except the one at Doctor's Care on James Island). They work hard. They generally deal with sick people and stressful situations all day. I respect nurses more, because I think that they actually do all the work, but really, I have no problem with doctors.

Except when they lack bedside manner.

Now, it's the first week of March. And during the first week of March for the past six years, I have gone to get my hoo-hah examined. This is all fine and good, a necessity. I complain about it less and less with each visit. And today I wasn't going to complain at all! I mean, I sat in the waiting room for only 5 minutes before getting my vitals taken. Another ten minutes and I was in the exam room being asked to, "take everything off as the doctor will be in shortly."

Shortly...as in...45 minutes later. Now folks, Charleston, SC has never seen cold like it has seen cold the past two weeks. So laying on a table in my altogethers with the "sheet" of paper provided to keep me covered up...for forty-five minutes? Even that is all fine and good; perhaps there was a little baby being born somewhere as I froze to death in the next room.

But when my doctor breezed in and exclaimed, "so I see you're worried about your weight...," things truly went downhill.

So, a little advice for my doctor friends.

(1) If your patient must wait in the nude for you, provide a heated bed.

(2) US healthcare benefits suck. In the five minutes you spend with me, I would like you to be concerned with me. I would rather not pay out the nose, plus the deductible, plus the co-pay to hear about your daughter's science fair project.

(3) When your patient is butt-naked and freezing cold, it's probably not the best idea to bring up her weight, and then to proceed to tell her that her methods of exercise really are not exercise at all. Even if it is the truth.

(4) It's probably not the best idea to continue to talk about how wonderful your methods of exercise are as you cram a speculum up your patient's vajayjay. A little respect. Perhaps some lavender scented candles. Soft music. A glass of wine. But don't go on and on about how you run 6 miles every evening on your fancy treadmill (that you can afford because you're a doctor) while you accost your patient.

(5) Go ahead and have that scrip for Zoloft filled out before you even walk in the door.

A passionate blog from a passionate person. And my hoo-hah is just fine.

Bedtime Blogging

2009-03-01T19:06:00.001-08:00

So, this blog has morphed about five times over the course of 30 minutes, namely because my computer crashed and had to reboot and restart and restore. In that time, I flipped through the notebook I've kept for close to two years and have finally decided that instead of trying to come up with anything new, I would share a few poignant (or not so poignant) things that have occurred to me as of late.
I've worked through a few Bible studies (David: 90 Days with a Heart Like His, Becoming a Women of Grace, Becoming a Woman of Prayer, Becoming a Woman of Purpose) since the summer of '07, prompting this writing.

9/16/07
Being consumed by God's grace, I cannot help but share it! Apart from his grace, I am only flesh and bones. I seek to be more...to be justified, sanctified, forgiven, free, faithful...all of which is available by grace. A humble, gracious woman. A kind heart. A quiet spirit.

Isaiah 30:18 "Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him!"

3/30/08
Father, how awesome to read back over the last 8 months - to consider Your constant work in me. I praise You, Lord for your action in my life. I praise You, Lord for strength and quiet. At times my heart is so heavy - my mind thinking too quickly and despite my best efforts to completely spaz out, You still me. I praise You, Jesus for the Cross. I praise You, God that You know me - that I am created as Your child. May my focus be on You, Your glory, Your sacrifice, Your power.

4/29/08
For my future husband: I pray that you would find joy in loving me, just as Christ loves the church and has given Himself for her. I pray that you are enabled to understand me, to show me honor as a co-heir of the grace of life. I pray that I respect you and submit to your authority, even as you submit yourself to His.

4/30/08
SACHAH: to bow down, to prostrate oneself as an act of respect before a superior being

5/7/08
Discerning God's Will
The biggest challenge is definitely he confusion in identifying what it is that I want for me and what it is that He wants for me. Ultimately, the two should be in tandem and that is certainly my goal. Differentiating between a door He has opened and a narrow space through which I am trying to squeeze myself can be tricky...I've learned that God's way is not necessarily the easiest, but it is the blessed. I know that He is more aware of my needs and how I can serve Him than I am.

"The cows obeyed the Creator of the cows."

I write these things because they are the thoughts that I like to share with friends who convict me. Who ask me the hard questions. I'm thankful that I have a Creator, Savior, Redeemer King who seeks intimacy with me. And I'm thankful that He has given me friends to remind me to consider Him in everything. Blessings on a new week!

Intertwined

2009-02-23T17:30:00.000-08:00

I love this picture. And I'm not even in it! But lots of my friends from camp are tagged and I've enjoyed reading their "conversation" about each other on facebook.
I've really been studying this picture. It seems like at Seneca, folks just tend to sort of pile on top of one another when someone grabs a camera! And there's this affection that is so evident in the photographs (not just this one, I have lots like this from the summers I worked) that you really understand that the people pictured genuinely like one another.
Intertwined.
I was having a really bad night about twenty minutes ago. My cell phone was about to be disconnected because I live paycheck to paycheck, and this month, Sprint does not get paid. I'm working my boonkie (thank you public school for that classy word) off working on our school yearbook and trying to pass my boards. I worry about my students. I feel like there's just not enough time...
And then I look at this picture. And what I realize I want...need...more than anything else, is to feel intertwined. I haven't felt that way in a really long time. To feel such a great affection from others that it just seeps through the skin and makes everything ok, if just for that moment.

Father, thank you for the constant reminder that as I seek to feel connected to others, You seek to feel connected to me. When I become overwhelmed by the things of this world, remove me from it. Seep into my skin, that I might feel the calm security that comes only from You.

Self-Control

2009-02-17T16:39:00.000-08:00

A follow up...
I do not look like Jennifer Garner. In fact, I don't look like anyone in Hollywood and on some mornings with my mullet, I'm not so sure that I even look like myself. Needless to say, the haircut did not turn out as planned. Despite the two photographs and the detailed description of my expectations, I walked out of Anne's Hair de Jour (can't really remember the name of the place) looking more like a character from My Name is Earl. And not any of the pretty ones.
Oh well. Hair grows. And thanks to the genes from my mother's side of the family, hair grows quickly!
I spent a really fun weekend at my parents' house and got all up in their Weight Watchers business. I am happy to report that with the combination of eating a little less and counting points and calling my parents when I don't know what I'm doing, I've lost 3 pounds in a week!
Still no beer, only a few thin mints, and (brace yourselves) even some exercise. I'm starting to believe that the friction caused by my thighs rubbing together will in fact not set me on fire, which has been a bit of a fear of mine for the last couple months!
The journey continues...

Getting My Hair Did and Other Important Changes

2009-02-09T16:18:00.001-08:00

Alright. It's time for a change. In my constant effort to become a better person all around, I've commenced the process of making some pretty significant adjustments in my life. I think that if I put them out there for all of two people to read, then maybe I'll stick with things. So, here it is...a bit of a confession, I guess.

I am no longer "living in the 'loft." My physician and nurse-friend, Shannon, are going to kill me because I decided to stop taking Zoloft without discussing the matter with a medical expert first. I've been on the good stuff for about a year and while it has helped me deal with stress tremendously, it has also led to some tremendous weight gain. I've been off for about four weeks and so far, so good. I have not killed or threatened to kill anyone. I have not kicked my dog. Why, I haven't even cried at something ridiculous.
I am no longer keeping beer in the house or putting myself in compromising situations in which alcohol is easily available. I tend to act like a complete idiot when I'm drinking and do not always set the greatest example for others while enjoying a cold brew, so I've really cut back. No beer in almost two weeks. Hoorah.
I am eating much healthier food than in the past. Even though my brother insists on setting Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and powdered doughnuts in obvious places in the kitchen, I am really making an effort not to partake. Instead, snacking on edamame and tomatoes...not so bad.

Why the changes, you may wonder? Well, the big reason is that for the first time in my life ever, I've considered my weight as "an issue." There are some mornings that I'm so bloated that I cannot see my feet. I happen to like my feet. And I've really been missing them. I weigh almost thirty pounds more than my brother. Holy smokes. And my parents, my personal heros, are participating in Weight Watchers together and are losing buckets of weight. They're pretty inspiring. So here are the hard facts. My current weight is........148.4....not exactly a Biblical number. I'm hoping to lose 20 over the next few months and to eventually be able to bend over and tie my shoes without blacking out. I should say now that I HATE exercise. Weezie and have taken up long strolls through the neighborhood, but with a dog who stops to pee on every other blade of grass, I'm not sure how productive those walks are.

A few changes more. I'm getting my hair did this weekend. Very excited. The first picture below is the color I'm going for. The second is the cut. Why Jennifer Garner, you ask? Turns out, she has the thickest head of hair in Hollywood, much like I have the thickest head of hair in the South.

So, the fun has begun. Wish me luck.

My Eggs are in the Millvale Basket

2009-02-08T15:26:00.000-08:00

I imagine that anyone who knows me figures that I spend anytime I'm not at school staring at my facebook page. And while this is somedays true, I thought that I might enlighten my readers on how I actually spend my free time (**I actually have no free time, but because I'm working on my boards again: procrastination, but somehow manage to find completely unproductive things to do just the same).

I really hope and pray to someday be a homeowner. And I'm trying to work it out with God that maybe I can be a homeowner in the greater Pittsburgh area, specifically, Millvale.

I do not live in Pittsburgh.

I have no job in Pittsburgh.

I have not enough money for a downpayment.

My credit is so terrible that I probably wouldn't be approved for a loan anyway.

But all of that aside, here is my house. 114 Beckert. It's a fixer-upper (thank you, HGTV).

Here's the living room, where I plan on spending most of my time redoing the fireplace. I've watched all of these grouting/mortar techniques on HGTV that are really quite inspiring.

I've even picked out the tile to remodel the fireplace. It has lots of deep reds, blues, and greens that match the frames I painted last summer with all of my old family pictures (Grandpa Sherbine sledding in Summer Hill, Pap in the shirt Grandma made him holding onto his catch of the day). Of course, the carpet looks pretty terrible. But I can live with that until I win the lottery and can put down dark hardwood floors.

Here's the kitchen. I can't really understand the layout from the photos online. I do know that the rose colored walls could never work for me, so I'm thinking some sort of metallic blue.

So, that's my new house. I'm pretty excited about it. But really, I'm more distracted by it. Now all I need is a job. And some money. And a loan approval. And the guarantee that this structure is not in the "flood zone" like all of the other structures in Millvale, the reason that there are so many cheap properties available in the first place.

General Randomness

2009-02-01T11:03:00.000-08:00

My typical Saturday mornings consist of a trip to the grocery store, filling up my gas tank, and cleaning up around the house. Yesterday was totally not the norm. Instead, I lay in a dark room on a heated bed while Monica rubbed all over me. There was relaxing music, a waterfall somewhere, and I was (almost) completely naked. That's right, folks, my first massage...ever. I lay there thinking up all of the things I could that would keep me from going to sleep because I didn't want to miss out on any of the excitement. Here are some of the thoughts that went through my head.

1. I really hope that this peppermint does not fall out of my mouth and get stuck to the sheets.

2. I really hope that this peppermint does not get lodged in my windpipe and that I choke to death during my first ever massage.

3. There is NO possible way that there are only 2 hands working out the kinks in my back. I'm pretty sure that there are five more people in here and I just cannot see them.

4. Monica truly has a gift. There are so many people who have jobs that are purely those of service. I am thankful that I got to spend an hour on the receiving end!

5. Monica is at Cloud 9 Spa on Maybank Highway. Go see her. You will not regret it.

On Monday, my sweet sister, Karen will spend her morning in a CAT scan machine. When I am with her, I am totally amazed that this kid who wasn't supposed to survive now radiates what it means to be alive...not in a breathing-and-has-a-pulse sense, but truly live...soaking up every once of goodness in the world and passing it along to everyone she meets. I get to spend a long weekend with her in a few weeks. I am so excited to cuddle with her and receive her kisses.
Today is the Super Bowl. I am so excited that I cannot nap. For a bit, I thought that I would be in Pittsburgh watching the game with friends. But after much thought and the knowledge that I'm making a genuine attempt to make financially responsible decisions, I am here instead. So, in an effort to entertain myself (and to convince the world that I am a total freak - as if any more convincing were required), my "friends" have joined me in Charleston for the festivities. Enjoy the pictures!

My Mind is All Twisted Like a Pretzel...I Got a Pretzel in My Head!

2009-01-29T18:57:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite lines from one of my favorite movies.

But pretty indicative of how I'm feeling right now. And since I've had trouble going to sleep for the past few nights because of my pretzelly thoughts, perhaps some blogging will help me straighten it all out. Or get it out of my system at least.

Do you ever feel like you're stuck in a bubble? Only you're not alone in the bubble? Maybe your whole life is in the bubble with you: work, home, chores, colleagues, grocery stores, the gum on the bottom of your shoe. I'm stuck in a bubble with my own life.

And I'm blessed. I know that I am. And I am so thankful for what God has given me and shown me and what He teaches me.

But I am so sick of being in this bubble. Because where I feel safe, secure, steady...is not where I am.

I am LITERALLY in the exact same place I was a year ago. I am sitting in the same spot with the same laptop. Tonight, I've been working on the same Boards. I'm doing the yearbook. Same. And I am pining for a place where I am not.

A big part of me feels so selfish about all of this. Who am I to complain or doubt or not have complete faith in the One who has put me where He has put me? And I want so desperately to be elsewhere?

Father, let me view where I am not as a bubble or a rut, but as the place that You have me for such a time as this. And if it is Your will, open the doors...pop the bubble...

that I might find someplace new.

For My NonFacebook Friends - HOLLA!!!

2009-01-28T17:59:00.000-08:00

So, there's this thing going around facebook where you post 25 random things about yourself. I normally do not participate in such fodder, but this was fun. And it makes me sound a lot more (or less) interesting than I actually am!

1. I have only one t-shirt that I can sleep in comfortably. I have had it since high school. It's a Reebok Steelers shirt with about 10 holes in it. Any other shirt I wear gets all wrapped around me in the middle of the night and I wake up very frustrated. Not so with my Steelers tee.

2. I really like being rubbed. Not in a pervy way. I like having my feet rubbed, and my head rubbed, and my back rubbed. My mom used to trace around the features of my face to help me relax at night. I always liked that.

3. Numerous people have told me that I should have been a comedienne. I hope that it's more a reflection of my quick wit and sarcasm as opposed to any crappy teaching methods.

4. I love the word "toot." I think it's hilarious. I hate the word "fart." It's crass.

5. I occasionally still sleep with my blankie. It's not my original blankie, though because it was lost long ago (I'm pretty sure my baby-sitter stole it). My blankie was made by my mother's mother and as a result of much loving, it has holes so big that I can actually pull it over my head. Which I do every once in a while.

6. I am the youngest of 6 children. Three boys and three girls. And I am the only white girl.

7. I think that the number sequence for my birthday is the most beautiful number sequence ever...3-8-82. See? Isn't it pretty?

8. I had a dog named Stud for almost 15 years. He died in my arms almost three years ago and it was the saddest day of my life. I promised myself I'd never love another dog like I loved him. A week later, I got Weezie. She weighs 67.2 pounds and likes to sleep in my lap. I love her.

9. I love the Pittsbugh Pirates. I don't care what anyone says.

10. A little part of me wishes I had stuck with career path numero uno: midwifery.

11. I think that kids with ADD are the funniest creatures on the planet. I plan on writing down the random things I've heard in my five years of teaching. I will publish said book, make lots oooh look! A chicken...

12. I have ADD. I am not medicated.

13. The most fun I've ever had at 1:30am was when Saint Jo and I participated in a wii bowling competition.

14. I am really proud of my parents and of who they are in our family and society.

15. I have a "nonteacher teacher bag" (that's actually how we refer to it in my family) because in graduate school I was really into teacher identity and didn't want to have an LL Bean canvas teacher bag like all of the other teachers I know. I love my leather messenger nonteacher teacher bag.

16. The first thing I think of every morning is Pittsburgh.

17. Ok, technically, I think of Pittsburgh second. Because first I think about how much I hate the sound of my alarm clock.

18. One of my favorite sounds is a chorus of children's voices.

19. Kevan and I sometimes get into terrible fits of laughter when neither of us can catch our breaths. Those are good times and normally take place in church or the grocery store.

20. My first kiss was in the fifth grade. I have not been kissed for four years.

21. I have a dangerous addiction to Coca Cola. For this reason, it is no longer permitted in the refrigerator. I once drank a 12 pack of Coke in less than 24 hours.

22. When I sneeze, I wet my pants just a little bit.

23. I once sneezed 47 times in a row. Had to change my pants.

24. My first childhood memory is of my dad guiding me into Karen's hospital room right after her drowning accident. He made me tell her hello before he would buy me a Snickers bar. Incidentally, my sister is my best bud and we "talk" on the phone almost every day. I hate Snickers bars.

25. I firmly believe that whoever discovered "fleece" is a freaking genius!

A Really Good News Week

2009-01-19T17:46:00.001-08:00

I am an absolute news junkie. Well, I should clarify. I am a national-world news junkie. I can't stand watching or reading the local news (not sure if it's the lack of relevancy or the bitter attitudes toward public education).

But I love national-world news. And some days, it's really crappy. The fighting in Gaza. That wanker investor who lost everyone's money. The nutjob who faked his own death because he wanted to avoid prosecution. The idiot Anthony's who literally stole a little girl's life away and display zero remorse whatsoever.

I'm not sure why I watch that stuff. None of it really makes me feel good about anything. But occasionally...just every once in a while...there's a good news week. And for that reason, I am most thankful for CNN and the fact that I get to watch it on my basic cable!

This whole plane crashing into the Hudson River on Wednedsay. I was actually sitting in a bar trying to warm up with a Winter Lager when the broadcaster cut in with the news. How amazing that those folks trusted one another enough to stand out on the sides of a friggin' airplane. How amazing that the pilot stayed calm enough to land the plane in the water in the first place. How amazing that all of those ferries were in the water to get everyone off the plane. How amazing that people recall hearing prayers all over the airplane.

And then there's my man, Barack. I have thought really highly of this man since he was elected to the Senate however many years ago. I'm drawn to folks who inspire. Who say what they're thinking. Who love their families. And now that Obama is moving into the White House, I feel really hopeful. Not the hope that I find in my salvation or in my family or in my faith...but hope that means that our country is going to be ok. That we'll be able to claw ourselves out of the rut we're in.

Finally...as if I need to even include this, Sunday night at approximately 10:30 was perhaps one of the happiest moments of my life. Not because I'd just watched the Steelers beat the feathers off the Ravens, or because Polamalu got a big play, or because Big Ben threw the ball to the boys in Black and Gold more than to the other team...but because of what number 7 said when he was asked what it felt like to be going to another Superbowl, "The Lord is good." Yeah, He is! And how amazing that minutes after winning a huge game, the first thing the team captain says is such a wonderful, perfect fact! I missed the press conference Mike Tomlin gave later, but he spoke to the media about how "iron sharpens iron."

So, I'm a news junkie. And everyday, past the corrupt politicians and stock brokers, past the ignorance, the bitterness, the hate...

...There He Is...

Landing a plane in the middle of a river.
Offering guidance to world leaders.
Remaining in the forefront of a team captain's mind.

Forgive me, Lord, for the moments that I don't see You because I'm not looking. I praise You for being ever near. Ever moving. Ever loving. Ever teaching.

A Good Night

2009-01-04T17:00:00.000-08:00

I never thought that walking quietly down a Folly Beach residential street would gain rank as one of my favorite moments ever...but it did. It does.
A while ago I asked for prayer for friends who had discovered that they are expecting a sweet baby in April. I'm happy to share with you now that those friends are my brother, Kreg, and his wife, Angela! Their lives were pretty much flipped upside down when they found out that they would be biological parents, after having been told numerous times that they would not. Imagine their (and our) surprise when in October, they took into their care two foster kids, Dominic (4) and Aidan (2). So our Christmas this year, a holiday that is normally very quiet and somewhat ho-hum, was anything but. With two little guys who are a constant reminder of family and unconditional love.

After a late night dinner at a little diner, my dad, Kreg, Angela, Aidan, Karen and I walked back to our rental house. The sky was crystal clear. Aidan rode on Kreg's shoulders and Dad sang "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" softly in Karen's ear. And I'm not sure what made it so perfect, but it was.
I've thought about Dominic and Aidan constantly since dropping them off at the airport on New Year's Eve. I worry about the "what if's." What if their parents get it together and Kreg and Angela have to let them go? What if their parents don't really have it together and cause the boys pain again? Will you join me in prayer for these little guys? For Kreg and Angela? For the boys' biological parents? For other kids who are in really sticky situations?
My family has always been so important to me. I'm thankful that my parents were involved in my life as I became an adult and that as such, I consider them my best friends. I hope you had a chance to really enjoy those you love over the holidays and as we all plummet back into our routines, that we remember where we came from, Who we came from, and Who we live for!

Recipes

2008-12-14T17:03:00.000-08:00

So, the fact that I even have an entry titled "recipes" makes me chuckle a bit. Never one to spend much time being productive in the kitchen, I've gotten a little brave as of late and have made some pretty good attempts at some tasty delights. Here are a few:

Peppermint Bark

Melt 18oz. white chocolate.

Break apart candy canes into bits no bigger than 1/4 in.

mix that junk up in a bowl.

Add a splash of peppermint extract.

Pour over some parchment paper and chill for about 45 minutes.

Break that mess apart and eat it up.

Lazy Pierogie Casserole

Put yourself 5 lasagna noodles (al dente) in the bottom of a glass 9x13ish dish.

Mix up an egg, 2 c. of cottage cheese and a dash of onion salt.

Plop that mixture right on top of those noodles.

Put yourself another layer of lasagna noodles on top of that.

Then put 2 c. of mashed potatoes with about a cup of cheddar cheese mixed in.

Put yet one more layer of lasagna noodles and then melt a c. of butter and mix that up with a c. of diced onions...dribble that deliciousness on the top of your casserole.

Pop it in the oven for 30 minutes at 350.

Porkchops a la Orange (or whatever)

Sear 4 boneless porkchops with a bit of salt and pepper.

Generously sprinkle some cinnamon on those bad boys.

Dump a can of mandarin oranges (with juices) on top.

Cover and let simmer for about 30 minutes.

Serve over egg noodles.

Butternut Squash Mac and Cheese

If you've got recipes, send 'em my way!

EKS

2008-12-07T18:00:00.000-08:00

Ena's first bath!

What a blessing a sweet new life is! I spent a majority of my time away from work over the past two weeks in the nursery at St. Francis Hospital, holding on to dear little Ena. The hospital plays a lullaby over the loudspeaker anytime a baby is born. One night, Ena and I hummed along to the song three times as more sweet little babies were brought into this crazy, wonderful world! Ena is home now, praise the Lord. Please continue to pray for her. She'll be on an apnea monitor for quite a while. Her parents are rockstars - handling everything with grace and a wonderful sense of humor.

Have a great week!

A Slap in the Face

2008-11-23T17:43:00.001-08:00

Soooo. I was going to start this post by saying that I am embarrased to have wiped the dust off my Bible tonight. And then I read my previous post. I suck.
I've been riding a wave for a few months...surrounded by great colleagues at work...enjoying my students who say the funniest things and truly entertain me for eight hours of the day...learning the game of golf...hours upon hours of Wii boxing...truly not a care in the world!
And when I am not stressed, I tend not to look inward. And when I do not look inward, I live in this state of pride and selfishness that is so blinding that it makes me see only what I want to see.

And then God slaps me in the face.

I spent time with my dear friends, Mark and Nicole, on Sunday. Expecting their first child in December, it's been really fun talking about the future with them. And then Tuesday Mark called down to my classroom - Nicole delivered Ena Kathryn on Wednesday morning after God knows how many hours of labor, with me watching the contractions on the monitor and discouraging Mark from saying innapropriate things to Nic in the middle of it all. Five weeks premature. Now, I love babies. And I've seen lots of them. But never have I seen anything as tiny and perfect as sweet little Ena. Today was the first day that I held her and in those thirty minutes of her in my arms, I was once again reminded of how Great He Is. How Ever Present. How His Hand is in Everything, though I cycle through the moments when I don't acknowledge It.
So, last week was a time of reflecting and praise for this sweet little life.
And then Friday morning came. And I did not pass my boards. And there was such frustration and screaming and crying because I really felt like I deserved to pass. I felt entitled to pass.
Ah, there's the rub.
My selfish entitlement.
When I picked up my God's Word tonight (and my 90 Day study of David that I've been reading though for a year...), I was reminded through Isaiah's words, "Your sins have hidden his face from you, so that he will not hear." I have always been an expectant one...looking ahead and what I do not have. But I get so wrapped up in my own sin that I do not see the blessings in front of me. How frustrating it must be for my Father to watch me go through this cycle time and time again.
When we focus more on our battles than on God, our enemy appears bigger, we appear weaker, and our God appears smaller. This cannot be.
If I could, I would sit in the level 2 nursery and love on Ena for all eternity. If I could, I would would make sure I pass my boards this second time around. If I could, I would make sure that my Bible never becomes dusty again. But once again I'm reminded that I need more than my own strength to do these things. I thank God for humbling me through Ena's early birth and my own earthly failure. I am thankful that the wave I was riding crashed last week and left me tiring of treading water. And I pray that I keep my eyes on the One who keeps His eyes on me.

Ruin Me

2008-09-10T16:21:00.000-07:00

So once again, I've gone over a month...almost two...without blogging. And it once again isn't because nothing exciting has happened. But I've failed in being introspective of late and have instead thrown myself into work and my kiddos. My blog isn't the only thing that's missing out on attention. I picked up my Bible and my Beth Moore study the other night and blew a month's worth of dust off the top.

Pretty pitiful on my part.

But glorious on God's part. When I got home one day last week, there was a number on the caller id from "Pennsylvania." How cool that an entire Commonwealth would call?! Imagine my joy when I listened to the voicemail from Pittsburgh Public requesting an interview...an interview that I have prayed for and waited on for more than a year. And yet, I am consumed with my kids in Charleston. And as much as I want to, I cannot be consumed with the children of Pittsburgh right now. So, I'll interview in May...

God has always worked on me to teach me how to wait. How my timeline is so much more imperfect than His. And that by trusting Him, He will make things happen...in His time.

I think that the phone call last week was from My Father, more than from the Commonwealth. A message saying, "Hey you. Where've you been? I'm still working on you, whether you spend time with Me or not. I miss you."

Well, here I am, Lord. Your servant is listening, willing to follow where You are leading, on your timeline and not my own.

The lyrics of Jeff Johnson...my reluctant prayer for some time...

Ruin Me

Woe to me I am unclean

A sinner found in Your presence

I see you seated on Your throne

Exalted, Your Glory surrounds You

Now the plans that I have made

Fail to compare when I see your glory

Ruin my life the plans I have made

Ruin desires for my own selfish gain

Destroy the idols that have taken Your place

'Till its You alone I live for, You alone I live for.

Holy Holy is the Lord Almighty !

Holy is the Lord!

Holy Holy is the Lord Almighty!

Holy is the Lord!

I leave you with a prayer request. A dear friend and her husband have been told that they will be parents in early April! This after they were told they would not have children of their own. This after they completed the application process to be foster parents. As delighted as they are, they are both very aware of the level of risk of her pregnancy. Will you join me in praying for health, patience, and trust? Let me know if there's anything I can pray for on your behalf, too. Cheers!

Sometimes He Comes in the Clouds

2008-07-17T06:53:00.000-07:00

I spent the first part of July driving around Western Pennsylvania, enjoying quiet moments (and rowdy moments) with old friends in Pittsburgh, and cherishing time with my parents at the lake house. If you've read my blog at all, you know that my theme for living is to be light. For my students, my friends, my family, random people I meet on the street. In my continued study of David, a warrior king who wanted nothing more than to go where God lead him, I've learned that my heart requires constant alteration in order that I may be light to those in need. I was in the car by myself for about 30 hours over the course of ten days. While I sang along with Jeff Johnson and David Crowder most of the way, there were times when I drove quietly...looking, listening.

The last year has been very interesting because it has led to me to completely different place than where I used to be, even though I haven't moved anywhere. I thought for sure that I would be spending this school year in cooler temperatures, surrounded by faithful friends with whom I have a great history - finishing each other's sentences, sharing the details of the Faith Walk, and working in the middle of the inner-city, which I felt called to do when I was 14. I prayed for this move more than I've prayed for anything in my adult life. At the tail-end of the each prayer, I mumbled "...if this is Your will, lead me down your righteous path." And yet here I am. And amazingly enough, I realize that with my Rock leading me, I am on His path. Though I don't know what is around the next bend and I am uncertain of what the final destination is, I am enjoying the walk with my Lord.

I really love summer thunderstorms. In Charleston, you can actually smell them coming before they get here! The thunder, the torrential rain, the sometimes power-killing lightning never lasts long and it's always hotter and muggier after the crash and boom than it was to start. But the constant reminder that weather, life, our circumstances, can turn on a dime and that there is a Consistent One who has my best interests at heart makes me ready and willing to accept His grace.

My God is Mighty to Save. May I never measure an obstacle against my own strength, but against Yours.

Pop pop pop pop pop pop pop pop......

2008-07-01T20:22:00.000-07:00

So, ten minutes ago, I was sleeping peacefully...listening to my ipod, dreaming about Brad Paisley and Dolly Pardon singing together in Heaven when I was awakened to the sound of a clicking (read: snapping, popping) noise. I thought for sure after a few seconds it would go away, but indeed it did not. This disruption went on for what seemed like forever - of course I had to investigate. So, with my loyal steed at my side, I located the obnoxious culprit at the window above my bed.

Could the screen be slipping out?

Maybe the glass is moving down?

Perhaps my prince charming is just outside, throwing pebbles to wake me up?

Not so much.

Picture this: A 26 year-old female, disheveled hair, wearing nothing but a ratty Air Force t-shirt and Campbell University cotton boxers standing in the front yard trying to figure out what in the Hey Ho has her up and out of bed a night before she has to interview 4 potential candidates for a teaching position. Believe you me, not a pretty sight!

After moments of banging on the outside of my house, the brother came out and announced that there was a bug (read: insect, critter) in the house one day this weekend making a popping sound. Mmmm. So, I did what any red-blooded American did who needs her rest. I grabbed the hose, cranked up the water to "jet spray," soaked the front of the house, and now am going back to sleep - in peace - knowing that if poppy-bug can't swim, he's S.O.L.

Just because you like Britney doesn't mean that I like Britney

2008-06-23T13:37:00.001-07:00

When the school year draws to a close, my life comes to a screeching halt! Praise God! This is the first time that I have done absolutely nothing with myself. I sleep late, go days at a time without showering, and do not a thing to enhance my intellect. I enjoy reading friends' blog updates and continue to pray wholeheartedly for God to open doors so that I can be effective in his ministry. Blessings to everyone. I'll touch base if anything exciting happens:)

1968

2008-06-08T09:07:00.000-07:00

Forty years ago today, my parents started our family. Awesome.

Glorious Day

2008-06-08T09:03:00.000-07:00

Timing is Everything

2008-06-08T08:39:00.001-07:00

So I've thought about blogging a lot over the past two weeks, but I could never think of a topic. Honestly, I've been in survival mode: teachers everywhere know what I'm talking about. When you're approaching a long holiday (or a weekend, for that matter) and your only goal is to make it there without going absolutely insane!

There were a few added obstacles to my "makin' it" this year. Without going into too much detail, there are a handful of folks who disagree with my teaching methods and practices. And that's all fine and dandy. I certainly did not go into my profession thinking that everyone would be happy with what I did all of the time. But what has been different this year is that folks have been really verbal with their disdain...dragging my reputation through the mud. Deliberately saying/writing things to hurt me. I don't think I've ever been faced with that before; people who have a desire to make another person feel bad are not the kinds of folk I tend to spend much time with.

Anyway (thanks for sticking with me if you've read this far), today was the first day in a while that I took time out to listen to God. I've been talking to Him a lot lately - begging Him to heal me, to heal those who aim to hurt me. Today I read about David and Goliath (a favorite story) and how David was ridiculed by his brothers because he'd split his time between tending his father's sheep and being there to battle the Philistines. His brothers questioned his motivations; when have my motivations been questioned?

The first question to direct my prayer and thinking was: Have you ever felt undervalued and unappreciated for what you do and who you are? *See above to read answer to that one.* The second question: How have you felt this sting the sharpest? Wow. Through all of my analyzing of what I did wrong as a teacher this year to make so many parents hate me so much, God slaps me with this realization: like David, who couldn't control how his brothers felt about him; he was just trying to do the right thing...there are times that we all suffer as a result of another person's opinions, words, blogs, etc. Who handles it more gracefully? David? or Kortney?

So what do we do with this? We cry out to Jesus, who said Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you...rejoice in that day and leap for joy, because great is your reward in heaven.

Sweet. Bring on the insults. My God and I can handle it:)

Sheryl Crow is Also a Strummer

2008-05-24T06:12:00.000-07:00

When I was 14, I bought a vintage Ibanez from this podunk music store in Cheraw. I don't know how to pick out notes, I don't know how to change strings, but in 12 years, I've figured out how to strum out some pretty heavy chords and have even accompanied elementary students in "Lunch Lady Land" (hogies and grinders, hogies and grinders, navy beans, navy beans, meatloaf sandwich...). Last fall, my dad sent a letter. He's a man of few sentimental words. I've always known that he loves me more than he can express, despite the fact that I was pretty rotten to him growing up. We don't ever talk about how much we care for each other. I don't thank him enough for what he continues to provide for me. We only hug when I'm done throwing everything back in my Jeep to drive back to Charleston after a too-short weekend at the parents' house. Anyway, in the mass letter to four of his six children, Dad wrote "please don't ever forget the importance of worship and of having worship be a primary focus of your life." He also wrote about geraniums and retirement and his blood pressure, but it was his plea for us to embrace our Lord through worship that had a great impact on me. I share this with the one and a half people who read this blog because as of late, when I am looking for "productive" things to do, I find my guitar in my hands - strumming the chords to Hosanna or Mighty to Save. And while I don't sing along (I'm a hummer), for the moments that my fingers are growing calloused on the strings of my vintage Ibanez, I am transported to a place of praise. At night when I am too weary to open His word, I turn to my ipod and pray that God would receive my praise through the words that the musicians sing for me. My parents gave me the gift of appreciation of music a long time ago. I hope that they know how much that appreciation, and the $150 vintage Ibanez that I had to work for through dish washing and leaf-raking has changed my heart. So now, to my one and a half friends who read this: please don't ever forget the importance of worship and having worship being a primary focus of your life. It is through worship that we gain intimacy with Our Creator, Our Redeemer, Our Savior.

My heart says of you, "Seek his face!" Your face, Lord, will I seek. Ps. 27:8

What Happens at the Greek Festival Stays at the Greek Festival

2008-05-12T18:01:00.000-07:00

First and foremost, nothing happened at the Greek Festival, save for the fact that my assistant principal bought me delicious Greek beer and told me that if he could be anywhere during the school day, it would be my classroom, being entertained by my teaching. That's one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me!
I had absolutely no intention of blogging tonight. I am tired. It is Monday. Those sentences are synonymous! But I've started reading the latest book club selection, Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer and quite honestly have never been so disturbed by anything I've read in my life. Since graduate school, I've become an avid reader. I consider this a blessing because it calms my mind (normally) and builds my vocabulary (somewhat). The problem with reading for me is that once I start reading a text, I am absolutely committed. Under the Banner of Heaven, from what I can tell 100 pages in, is a documentary of the Mormon faith with a focus on Mormon Fundamentalism. I don't really understand any form of Fundamentalism. I went to a college where Southern Baptist Fundamentalism was somewhat evident. It bothered me then...the appearance of being so intense about faith that there at some point is a departure from Truth. So tonight, as I set the book aside and prepared for my devotions, it became apparent to me that what I crave, what I long for, and what I seek is Truth.
All of this was running through my mind as I flipped open by Beth Moore Study, David: 90 Days with a Heart Like His (shameless plug) and and my trusty Schofield to read about how the Israelites rejected God (not Samuel) when they asked for a king; they genuinely wanted something that was not in God's plan.
Humble me, Lord, that I might accept YOUR way and not my own. That I would let You be King. Samuel always obeyed. Guide me through the doors You have opened. Let me not kick down the ones I'd like to see ajar.
"Faith sometimes means forgoing our desires because we trust Christ to have a better plan for our lives." (BM)
Truth can very easily be whatever one makes it out to be. That is the essence of faith. But faith in my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ means that I accept that it is He who brings Truth. Not Joseph Smith. Not Oprah. Not Dr. Oz. Not spiritual leaders with their own agendas.
As I have typed this, Weezie has wet the bed. I will have a classroom full of 21 eager and dependent 8-year olds tomorrow. My coffee will begin to percolate at 6:00am. My rent check will be 5 days late because I could not find a Forever stamp. These are all truths.
But, praise the Lord, these are minuscule truths compared to His grace, Love, and Plan for all of us. May we "see that times of difficulty or decision in our lives are meant, by Your sovereign love and mercy, not to pressure us into impatience but to rather grow into patience and endurance."

Psalm 61:2

2008-05-06T17:19:00.000-07:00

"What do you think was your character flaw?" I had not seen my friend, Adair, in over a year and this was the first question she asked after the crowd dissipated and there were only three of us left. I'm always impressed that God takes me to "home" to hear questions like this - questions that are never easy to answer and lead to days of pondering, prayer, and reconciliation.
"I was sad," was my response. Not exactly a character flaw, but I was telling the truth; sadness was certainly the condition in which I placed myself for most of my adolescence. It was no one's fault but my own. And I'm thankful that I can take a step back and see how It is God who has completed me, Who dominates my heart, and fills me with His Spirit so that I feel like if I were to be bumped, It is He Who would pour out of me. That is my hope anyway.
But the character flaw question I'm still having a hard time with. I trusted the wrong people, for sure. I misstepped and had a quick tongue. I alienated myself from people because I was scared of what they might teach me. All the while these thoughts occur to me, a voice keeps saying, "You can't think of one not because you didn't have any - you had many - but because you are forgiven and are living anew in Me."
One of the greatest blessings of my job comes in the form of my friend, Charsie, who comes by at the same time everyday to interrupt my science lessons, during which I'm usually accidentally misinforming my students on the ways of the world. Charsie and I come from very different backgrounds and have led very contrasting lives. But each morning, when I get to school, she is the first one I speak to and praise God, our words often turn to what He is doing in our lives! We recently started the Bible study David: 90 Days with a Heart Like His. It is only Day 7 and already I feel the Lord working in me! What a blessing it is to meet with a friend daily to exchange how we are gaining intimacy with the Lord through His word.
This all brings me to a verse that I came across in my reading:

From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint;

lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

That, folks, is my character flaw. A reluctance to call out; a tendency to believe that I can handle life on my own. I did it my entire adolescence...I cried out not to my Lord and Savior, who I invited into my life when I was six years old, but to people who could do nothing for me because they are not Him. I am not Him. I am not a Rock.

Recumbency. I first came across this word in a Bible study, Becoming a Woman of Grace. The word encompasses the Puritan belief that true reliance on God means to, lie down, face to the ground, on the Solid Rock. I've referred to Seneca Hills in my blog before and my last visit there coincided with an awesome spiritual event that sparked my journey down this road of really praying that God would change my heart into one like His. I walked down to the creek ("crick" if you're in western Pennsylvania) and picked up a smooth rock. I held it in my hand for the 13 hour drive back to Charleston and prayed for the first time that I would let God lead. I commited there, driving my Jeep, with a smooth rock in my hand, to lie down. To fully submit. And to let the Lord be Lord. Lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.

How We Spend Sundays

2008-04-27T16:05:00.000-07:00

Weekends are a blessed time around Yates Avenue. I used to not appreciate Saturdays and Sundays much. Instead, I would spend the entire time trying to get work done or cleaning myself into an absolute frenzy. But God has worked with me this year on slowing down – in many aspects of my life – and truly enjoying rest. Here are a few pictures from today when Kevan, Weezie, and I went to Folly Beach. Weezie had been once before to splash in the waves and she always has a blast. Please note that in my new found appreciation of the weekend, I turn into an absolute redneck for 48 hours (read: watching nascar, rodeo, camping in the backyard, etc.), hence, the camo hat. I pray that you are feeling refreshed and renewed by God’s creation as this weekend draws to a close.

Updates...

2008-04-19T14:50:00.000-07:00

First and foremost, Praise the Lord in Heaven - I passed the PLT! Additionally, I have received my Pennsylvania teaching certification. It's all a bit surreal..for those of you keeping track, I took TWO wrong tests before taking the right one...so this has been a while in the making!

So next comes mailing off packets and updating my online file. Thank you so much for your prayers while the job search continues.The school year is winding down and each year at this time I begin to reflect on how special my students are. Tomorrow, I will go to mass to see one receive her first communion. Having been confirmed five years ago, the experience is still pretty fresh in my mind. As an adult, I know that I processed things more logically than Abigail probably is this weekend, but I'm still excited to see her drink that "nasty wine" for the first time! On Thursday the kids and I went on a field trip. I've posted two of my favorite pics. One is of the alligator we saw in the swamp. The reflection of the girls in the front row is priceless! The other is a group shot. I love the diversity of my group this year!

I Still Believe

2008-04-14T15:36:00.000-07:00

Scattered words and empty thoughts
Seem to pour from my heart
I've never felt so torn before
Seems I don't know where to start
But it's now that I feel Your grace fall like rain
From every fingertip, washing away my pain
I still believe in Your faithfulness
I still believe in Your truth
I still believe in Your holy word
Even when I don't see, I still believe
Though the questions still fog up my mind
With promises I still seem to bear
Even when answers slowly unwind
It's my heart I see You prepare
But it's now that I feel Your grace fall like rain
From every finger tip, washing away my pain
I still believe in Your faithfulness
I still believe in Your truth
I still believe in Your holy word
Even when I don't see, I still believe
The only place I can go is into Your arms
Where I throw to You my feeble prayers
In brokeness I can see that this was Your will for me
Help me to know You are near
I still believe in Your faithfulness
I still believe in Your truth
I still belive in Your holy word
Even when I don't see, I still believe
-Jeremy Camp

Amen.

Mar said I haven't blogged in a while...

2008-04-14T15:01:00.000-07:00

I can't believe that it's been over a month since I've blogged. It's not like nothing has happened worthy of sharing. Indeed, the opposite is true. I finally turned in my National Board portfolio, made the trip of a lifetime over Spring Break with my mom to Pennsylvania, and came across this blog, written by a parent of one of my students:
"...my son's 2nd grade teacher is a moron...apparently, she is a teacher that feels intimidated by parental support in the school. She basically wants to micro manage 21 8-year olds. Best of luck with that."
Now, that is only an exerpt of the page-long entry. I came across it about a month ago and had the urge to puke for about 12 hours after seeing the words scroll down the screen.
God's strength is stronger than words, for sure, and He picked me right up, dusted me right off, and sent me back to work eager to be light, compassion, education, and love for the child of this parent who evidently does not care for me very much.
I first understood the power of words the day that I found out my mom had been diagnosed with leukemia. I went to the dry cleaners and the lady behind the counter was really short with me. I remember walking out to my car and thinking, "she has no idea what I've been through today. How dare she speak to me like that!" That moment was very poignant for me because immediately God revealed all of those moments that I spoke out of turn, not considering where people were coming from, where they were headed, what they had been through...and as I drove out of the parking lot, I prayed that the lady behind the counter would find peace. That her spirit would be stilled, and that she would accept the embrace of Christ.
I've had a similar reaction to being called a moron (and a host of other things as the blog goes on) and it has nothing to do with me! I started a nightly prayer last summer that God would change my heart - into what it needs to be so that I can be effective in His ministry. Some days I feel the hand of God on my heart, tugging, molding, and shaping it...pulling out the impurities and replacing them with His grace.
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:5
Father, I praise You. I praise You for creeping into my thoughts, into my heart, into my soul. Guide me in being Your light. Forgive me, Lord, for the times my thoughts get away from me. Help me as I live by your example.

My dog hogs the bed...

2008-03-03T19:00:00.000-08:00

So I was on my way to bed...in bed, actually...tossing and turning as I have been known to do of late. I used to be a champion sleeper. Once my head hit the pillow, I was out. Now in order to get settled, I have to have Weezie in the bed with me. She is large and takes up lots of space. But somehow her presence, her snoring, that disgusting second eyelid that shows when she's almost asleep...those things are very comforting to me.
My life has been a little stressful. A friend of mine said that I am in a place of transition, even though I'm not really moving anywhere. I thought that was a good idea. Tonight I did not want to toss and turn, so I clicked on the lamp and pulled out my Bible and the study I'm currently (slowly...not as regularly as I should be) working on, Becoming a Woman of Purpose. And before I read anything, I found myself praising God. Just for His presence. I have cried out to Him more in the past month than I can remember for a long time...I've been impatient, frustrated, exhausted, confused, desperate...and yet through it all, I feel His presence, His hand guiding me, His love calming my restless heart. I only read a little of my Bible study because I flipped open the book and immediately read something from my main man (second only to Myron Cope, r.i.p.), Oswald Chambers:
by the reaction of your life on the circumstances around you, you will fulfil God's purpose, as long as you keep in the light as God is in the light...
I don't feel like I've been light for much of anyone lately. I've been snippy with my kids, annoyed with my friends, at my wits' end with the general public. How are my reactions on the circumstances around me showing Christ's love? Are they at all? February was a long month, literally. The fact that this is a leap year was really just a kick in the pants. But the old is gone, the new has come. And I pray that I would continue to feel God's presence and that others see Him through me.
Now it is time to wake the beast...to shove over the 55 pound mongrel who snores next to me...and to rest in God.

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
Psalm 62:5-6

On my bed, I remember You; I think of You through the watches of the night. Because You are my help, I sing in the shadow of Your wings. My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me.
Psalm 63:6-8

Reflections from Summer Camp

2008-02-18T13:47:00.000-08:00

"Booger in my nose...when I sneeze 'ACHOO', out there it goes."

I've been sending messages back and forth all day with a friend I worked with at Seneca regarding a little shtick we did anytime we'd get hit in the mammaries (hard to believe that anyone can come up with a shtick about something like that - the implication is that the contact happened a lot, but it was summer camp, so who knows). We'd yell out "Nancy" (as in Reagan) anytime said contact occured, which lately I have not found as funny since our beloved Nance really is in the hospital.
But somehow thinking about:
-Nancy
-my friend and how when I met her she was losing about 10 pints of blood out her nose
-how when I first encountered a group of 40 people (with whom I'd spend nine solid weeks), none of them would speak to me because they thought I only spoke French
-late nights spent talking in a top bunk
-getting toothpaste squirted up my nose
-feeding pancakes to chipmunks
-watching skunks prowl around girls hill
-learning about what Lyme's Disease is
-covering for friends when they broke curfew
-chasing bats through the condo with brooms and buckets (cue Dwight Shrute)
-getting the call that a friend died
-being stopped TWICE by the Beaver Falls Police for "parking"
-trips to the Salvation Army
-the Chicago Concert at Star Lake
-Vision Quest
-dropping to my knees during a thunderstorm, completely in awe

I continue to be amazed that I pick up with these people, most of whom I have not seen in 10 years, right where we left off. And I wonder only for a moment how in the world we lived together for nine weeks and had less drama, less selfishness, less bitterness than any relationship that I have had since then. I only have to wonder for a moment because the reason is clear: relationships that are built on Christ and His sacrifice are longlasting. I completed a Bible study, "Becoming a Woman of Grace" last fall and at one point listed my "life giving friends." It was discouraging then that so few of my life giving friends are with me physically, but so encouraging that they are still such an important piece of who I am.
Most of you know that I am pursuing a move to Pennsylvania. It's been a long time coming (I first tried in 1998, thanks for nothing Grove City College). I don't want to move to join the union. I don't want to move to hear funny accents. I don't want to move to be close to the Steelers (although that is a big motivation, believe you me). But I want to be close to those I feel connected to. Join me in praying that God might guide me through His will for my life and that He might humble me to His service. Peace to you.

My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness. 2 Cor. 12:9